Navigating Relationships with ADHD or AuDHD: Support That Makes Love Easier

Therapy for Adults with ADHD and/or Autism in Long-Term Partnerships

You’ve spent years trying to hold it all together—for your partner, your household, your job, and your identity. But behind closed doors, you’re exhausted. Emotionally, mentally, even physically.

You may have just been diagnosed with ADHD or Autism (or both), and suddenly, everything makes sense—and everything feels like it’s falling apart at the same time. Your partner is frustrated. They want answers, solutions, and change. Fast.

Maybe they’ve said:
“You need to fix this.”
“You’re not trying hard enough.”
“I can’t keep living like this.”

You’ve been trying your whole life. But now, the weight of undiagnosed neurodivergence, unspoken resentment, and years of masking is catching up with you—at work, at home, and in your relationship.

When Being Yourself Feels Like Too Much—and Not Enough

Reconnect and Rebuild: What to Do When ADHD or AuDHD Was Missed Until Now

Many adults with ADHD or Autism go undiagnosed for decades. You learned to over-function, over-apologize, and over-mask just to keep relationships intact. But without knowing why certain things were difficult—like task-switching, emotional regulation, time management, or interpreting tone—it was easy for others (and yourself) to label it as laziness, selfishness, or forgetfulness.

Now that you finally have clarity, your partner may be angry, confused, or even skeptical. They may not understand that your brain works differently—and they may not care how it works. They just want things to change. Fast.

This often leads to:

Spouse burnout: a partner who’s emotionally checked out, resentful, or threatening to leave
Chronic masking: suppressing your needs to avoid conflict or rejection
Emotional shutdown: feeling frozen, hopeless, or constantly afraid to say or do the wrong thing
Guilt and shame: believing you’ve “ruined” the relationship
Hypervigilance: walking on eggshells trying to keep the peace
Self-erasure: losing your identity in the effort to keep others comfortable

You Deserve a Place to Be Your Whole Self

Trying to fix your relationship while also unlearning a lifetime of internalized shame is too much to do alone.

Therapy gives you space to:

Process the reality of a late ADHD or Autism diagnosis
Understand how your symptoms affect communication, intimacy, and emotional labor
Learn tools for self-regulation, task management, and boundary setting
Rebuild your identity outside of constant performance and people-pleasing
Address partner fatigue without taking on 100% of the blame
Reconnect with your needs, values, and voice—safely and without judgment

You deserve support that sees you, not just your diagnosis.

You Are Not the Problem—But You Deserve Support

Too often, partners see ADHD or Autism as something that needs to be “fixed.” But you’re not broken. You’re neurodivergent in a world (and relationship) that hasn’t understood your wiring.

This therapy space is designed for adults navigating:

AuDHD relationship strain
Emotional shutdown from constant criticism or correction
Masking fatigue at home and at work
Feeling like the relationship will fall apart if you don’t change fast enough
Misunderstood executive functioning issues that look like avoidance or irresponsibility
Unmet needs for emotional safety and authentic connection

You shouldn’t have to choose between being accepted and being in a relationship.

What Therapy Looks Like with Victoria

This isn’t traditional talk therapy—and that’s intentional.

As a licensed therapist, special education teacher, and project management professional, I combine clinical insight with strategy, structure, and real-life tools. Sessions are collaborative, educational, and designed to help you not only understand your neurodivergent brain—but also work with it.

You’ll get:

30-minute virtual sessions to match your energy, schedule, and focus
Targeted support for late-diagnosed adults navigating identity shifts and relationship strain
Validation, not shame, around task fatigue, shutdowns, emotional flooding, and executive dysfunction
Relationship-focused sessions that explore communication patterns, conflict cycles, and burnout
LGBTQIA+ inclusive, poly-aware, trauma-informed care that welcomes all identities and relationship styles
Practical homework and personalized tools between sessions to reinforce growth
Data-driven insights to track emotional triggers, executive functioning, and progress
Support to unlearn automatic emotional responses built from years of masking, criticism, or trauma

This is therapy that teaches and heals. You won’t just talk about the problem—you’ll start to rewrite the way your brain responds to it.

You Don’t Have to Walk on Eggshells Anymore

You are not alone. Let’s make space for your truth.

You’ve spent so much of your life trying to manage other people’s expectations that you’ve forgotten how to be yourself. You’re exhausted from trying not to mess up, forget something, or say the wrong thing. You’re overfunctioning in every part of life—and falling apart behind the scenes.

Here’s what you need to hear:
💬 You’re allowed to take up space.
💬 You’re allowed to ask for clarity and compassion.
💬 You’re allowed to stop pretending you’re fine when you’re not.

You don’t need to mask anymore—not here. This is your space to feel seen, supported, and finally start healing. Even if your relationship doesn’t survive this season, you can.

And you don’t have to do it alone.

Master’s of Arts, Creative Arts Therapy
Master’s of Education, Special Education
Currently working on PhD

Licensed Professional Counselor in PA, NV, VA and AZ
Licensed Mental Health Therapist in FL
Licensed Creative Arts Therapist in NY
Internationally registered advanced addiction Therapist

ADHD Certified Professional (ADHD-CCSP)
Certified Advanced Addiction Counselor (CAADC)
Certified Integrative Mental Health Professional (CIMHP)
Narcissistic Relationships, Emotional Abuse & Gaslighting: Treating and Empowering Survivors of Relational Trauma
Project Management Professional (PMP)